Remember this: A good dog always keeps his nose either to the ground or in the air.
This evening I spent about two or three hours in a 12 acre Pine stand with a machete cutting off the lower limbs to make way for a tractor to drive through the rows. There were places riddled with briars. I was also keeping Deep Woods Off in business but the thought of poisioning myself with deet and helping the mosquitoes spread West Nile didn't make no never mind to me. By the time I got through I had lost more than one battle with the thorned bush as the tale tell red marks were on my ankles. I was making my observations as I was walking through. The pine stand abutts a cotton field but has a grass road around it so one can drive a full circle around it. I was moving along at a relaxed pace whacking and looking at the ground. I noticed something heavy with a big split toe was visiting the spot. I thought that was interesting as there were not a lot of tracks to see there. Out on the sandy dirt road I could see the deer prints traveling up and down the drive. I walked along the cotton field. Nothing. Maybe it was Santa's reindeer I thought or a Jesus deer that could walk on water or not touch land? Probably not. One blister, one broken ax and a bad tick investation later, my son and I went back to the ranch. I wanted to get this hanging feeder out of a tree because it was never used and there was another one left on a different tree. My son drove along the outside of a field in a fit to get revenge for almost tossing him and his friends out my truck~he almost tossed me: right into the bushes. Don't worry! I am an old pro. I held on for dear life. lmao.
Let me tell you. This kid was complaining about everything at this point but he was hungry. After we got this big J shaped PCV pipe I instructed him on which way to go. I got him to drive through the woods which he dubiously did. I don't think he trusts me sometimes? I got out and moved limbs for him. We finally got through the woods to the other side where I wanted to be and put up the feeder. Looking over the acreage you can see that the deer tore through it since they cut the pine stand from last year down by eating leaves and stripping anything green. Now in some places its like a tunnel system you would see underground. Dark and uninviting. One of my prospects was to grow ginger root in the area.
After we finished this I took my son home to feed him but then came back to sit in a stand in the far rear of the acreage. I figured I wouldn't see anything but got a little squirmy back there for some reason.
I will not lie. The other day I saw a buck come out the woods trailing his girls. Since then I have been anxious over this deer and worried someone else would shoot him before I did. Oh the horror! lmao. I have been mulling it over trying to figure out where to position myself to get this one buck. He runs slow and he holds his head like a chinese goose that is about to attack. Down and forward. Moving he doesn't look very big. Maybe he is a midget deer. Big rack no substance? This buck is one of those kind that will sleep under your window at night then knock on it with his horns saying, "Haa haa. Here I am. You haven't got me yet, you moron."
Back to my train of thought, I was sitting in this stand being all squirmy and playing with a buck grunt. While I waited I tied this blistering bright orange nylon string onto the 30-30. I wanted it to hang across my back and not off my shoulder this way I could crawl in and out of tree without the butt of the gun hitting beneath me. I have no idea why but all day I was thinking in my mind that it wasn't a day to sit in a stand or be on the look out. As I was sitting there I thought I heard the voices of men but they sounded like they were coming from a tube? I finally got to hot and said, "Screw it. I am going to the house." I crawled out the stand and made my way back across the field in grass that was way over my head. The idea that something could come tearing through there did cross my mind. I walked up to my truck but saw something moving. I stopped then realized it was a tri-colored beagle with an orange color. I started to call him thinking he might come to me. He crept off under the truck. I offered it some water in a ceramic flower pot. No go. It acted like it wanted to come to me but grinned then went back under the truck. I started to laugh at it and asked, "Do you have rabies? You looked like you have rabies." He grinned again from under the bed of my truck. I laid my rifle up on the tailgate. Who the hell had turned their dog loose back here? Or was it from somewhere else. I decided I would just get in my truck. Once I did I sat there thinking about this stupid dog that looked a little old. Ugh! I thought I would make one last try. I opened the door and looked back at the dog who was at my tailgate. "Dog, I am going to leave you here to die unless you would like a ride?" I hit my leg a time or two then waited. He was thinking about it. Finally after a hilarious stare down and one toothy grin he conceded to me and walked over with his head down. I felt kinda bad for him. That dog knew it was go time. He crawls up to my foot and lays down on his belly like he's saying, "I don't know what you're going to do to me but I don't want to stay here." I didn't know if he was one of those kinds of dogs that if you pick them up they will bite you. I reached down and grabbed him by the loose skin on his neck then hauls him into my lap. I tossed him into the passenger seat where he laid down full on panting. I shut the door and started to laugh as I looked at this dog. "It's your lucky day dog. Aren't you glad I came along?" I turned on the truck then drove back off with the dog who looked like a Barney. I got back to the house and wrote the number down then called his master. His master was this skinny guy driving a Nissan. When he came to collect him, two huge guys jumped out and I wondered how they all got in there. I stopped skill sawing a board then gave him his dog who stunk up my truck. I did feed him some dog food and water him. This guy named Tron (someone liked Disney I guess) told me he was using these beagles to run deer across the river. They swam acrossed it to find their way on my side. Now I know why the deer came out the swamp on Friday. I didn't say much to him but they packed back in the sardine can truck then took off to look for the other dogs they turned loose and left. I did notice they didn't have tracking collars on them. Must not care to much about getting them back is all I can say. I watched Barney drive away in his dog box down the road never to be seen again.
After they left I finally cut my boards then took the schnauzer down in the golf cart to put boards in the box stand so I can have a writing surface while I wait and a cooler.
Once again in a weird fit when I got back I crawled up on top of the buck barn to view the back field that is used for a quail-dove plot. As the light got dim I thought I saw something in the shadow of the tree line but decided I needed to quit and crawl down before I fell down in the dark. I can imagine how the scene would look: me laying lifeless on the ground between a toilet and a shower my brother had left for my dad to install 'somewhere' and I stress 'somewhere'.
My tombstone epitaph: THE BUCK MADE HER DO IT!.
Written by: W Harley Bloodworth
~Courtesy of the AOFH~
